Darius McCrary: Child Support is Meant for Kids, Not a Failed Relationship (Part 12)

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Part 11: https://youtu.be/zEFivd6U6LU
Part 1: https://youtu.be/dHB-H1VLcd8

In this clip, Darius McCrary opened up to VladTV about his organization, Fathers Care. He explained that his own experience navigating the court system for custody and child support agreements led him to start the organization to help other fathers who want to be in their kids’ lives. He went on to speak about his views on child support and feeling like children are benefitted more by a trust fund. To hear more, including the large expenses that come along with the court system, hit the above clip.

Darius McCrary stars in the new show ‘Monogamy’ on the Urban Movie Channel. Watch the trailer here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cy0-0Ay0XwY <br> <h3>Auto Generated Captions</h3>

well I just want to cover one more thing
before I let you go you actually have a
nonprofit called father’s care yes and
which focuses on fathers you have two
children of your own
oh I see I have three three so yeah yeah
I got it I got a a little baby
I have Zoey and there’s Zach yeah those
are my kids and um you know man
my my experience with my son led me down
a very difficult road and it’s it’s been
a really ugly experience of what the
court system can do to men who really
want to be in their children’s lives man
you know the system wasn’t broken it was
designed this way and what we try to do
is we try to work with fathers excuse me
to help them navigate through those
rocky waters an advocate her name is
Kenya in K or K in on Instagram on
Facebook and it’s a cold-blooded hustle
man child support is for child to
support the child not failed
relationships and we’ve just witnessed
how fathers have been moved out of the
house since the welfare system I was a
producer on a documentary called where
are the fathers where are all the
father’s you know and now we’re in a
society now it’s very difficult for a
man to be a man you know we’re seeing
you know so much before our very eyes
where the protector is being removed
from the home you know and that’s what
we try to do man we try to make sure
that you know we can advocate we can
help fathers deal with the depression
that comes along with the anxiety that
comes along with being separated from
your child we go through just as much
you know they they they as women but
we’re told man up be a man you know
well when you do with these emotions you
know so that’s what we try to do man we
try to work with dads
cuz cuz dad dads have feelings too well
yeah I’ve interviewed a number of men on
my show who really went through a
nightmare to try to get custody of their
children like for example I interviewed
Matt Barnes recently and I don’t know if
you know about the whole Gloria Javan
thing where all that escalated in this
crazy school parking lot fight where he
ended up getting full custody of his
twins and he said it cost him about a
million dollars to do it and what he
said was interesting was you know you
know she got arrested over the incident
he got full custody but fast forward to
today she never went to prison and now
they have shared custody whereas if it
was the man in that particular role he
would have definitely gone to prison and
he would not have any custody probably
for the rest of his life like I said I’m
in I’m in the front passenger door I
open up the back door and walk around
that door and Carter jumps out I reach
across the car because Isaiah’s sitting
behind the driver which is Gloria to
reach for Isaiah’s hand and all of a
sudden she slams like she puts the car
in reverse and like the car door hits me
I lose contact with Isaiah I kind of
stumble for a second Isaiah falls back
and see what the fuck you doing she
tries to drive the car halfway in the
car tries to put the car in reverse and
back out so keep in mind there so this
is two lanes of traffic at 3 o’clock
where their other kids are being picked
up kids are walking other cars are
moving all this kind of shit I’ll tell
you man it’s not set up for us to get
our kids because it costs me a whole lot
of money you know any me knows you spent
man over a million you spent a million
dollars there’s another there’s other
legal costs that I’m currently you know
going through with her absolutely and
this is where it is unfair you know
especially in today’s world you can’t
have it both ways you can’t want to be
independent want to be you know on the
front lines want to be I’m woman hear me
roar and then also at the same time
saying I’m the weaker vessel oh you know
it it doesn’t work you know there has to
be some real balance and
the system doesn’t give us any balance
and you know Matt Barnes is a real
soldier for being able to fight the way
that he did but everybody doesn’t get
those opportunities in those breaks
everybody doesn’t have the financial
means to go into court I mean and and
and to fight you know because that’s
what happens in court I mean let’s face
it you’re going in and the lawyers are
the ones who really end up winning the
children don’t win the lawyers win
that’s who makes all the money I mean I
I got money still on books
what attorneys now and in situations
that I was was able to navigate through
you know um with my with my daughter we
have a great relationship you know you
know and I just want to wanted to say
Tami’s an amazing mother um amazing
woman and you know we went through
whatever we went through but we were
able to be wise enough to say this will
affect this child’s future and we would
rather have this money here for her
future for her trust fund trust fund
versus child support which is another I
hate to say this but imma keep it real
it’s another system it too that is used
in the urban community because we have
we don’t even have the knowledge of most
of us of what a trust fund is but we
know how to get somebody on child
support
it’s crazy bro and I’m just keeping it
real
you know um but but but we made an
agreement and and and we’re working past
all of that and and and and and I look
at what it’s doing for my daughter
you know who’s just so amazing you know
and Big Ups to her mother for being wise
enough to understand that you know well
yeah I just had a Tito Ortiz on my show
you know the MMA fighter and he had
twins with jenna jameson you know the
adult film star yes and he said they it
costs about half a million dollars with
him and but he’s had full custody of his
kids for the last you know six years and
she hasn’t even seen her kids in those
last six years in 2011 actually 2012
find up getting a restraining order and
getting
full custody of my children and I’ve
been a father since and she hasn’t been
around in six and a half years and
having full custody of my kids she just
walked away and it’s sad but you know
the same time she’s she’s a victim of
her own self and I try to help somebody
I couldn’t help and it took me a lot of
physical therapy or see me rehab to
really get through those things with a
therapist and it’s the things you got to
do as a parent and it’s just it always
gets painted a certain type of way for a
man to get custody of his children is
almost unheard of it’s almost impossible
now this was so cold-blooded about it
with my son I had full custody I had
custody of my son my son lived with me
and once again being in the media um I
taught him how to write how to read he
was reading in two years old um
I mean taught him how to walk talk all
that um and being that my life once
again is in the public and we were able
to use certain things in the public
because it’s unfortunately we’re in a
society today where somebody can make an
allegation and you have to spend all of
your resources trying to prove that the
allegation has no merit
it isn’t innocent until proven guilty
anymore you know story comes out as
circulating and you’re stuck with that
you know so um it’s it’s it’s very
difficult and almost impossible you know
but um Todd your father’s out there you
got to just keep fighting and
understanding that the opportunity will
present itself
you know like Matt you know I mean that
was just a break that happened because a
lot of times there is a certain sense of
entitlement that comes along with with
you know being a custodial parent
unfortunately and a lot of times it’s
used to gloat to taunt and to take
advantage and to bully the non-custodial
parent you know so this is a something
that’s very close to my heart and
anybody that’s watching this interview
you know you reach out to me you can’t
get to me reach out to flat um you know
I’m all about that life because it’s
about the real best interests of
children it is better it has been said
that it’s better
to repair to raise successful men than
to repair broken children broken
individuals and we’re all operating out
of brokenness but we want to try and
avoid the brokenness and to raise
successful individuals that’s what’s
gonna make this world a better place
that’s what’s gonna make make a proper
contribution to humanity and and you
ain’t got to be on stage to make a
proper contribution to humanity you
ain’t got to be a singer actor you could
be raising the next president you could
be raising the next civil rights leader
you can be raising the person that cures
cancer the person you know you can be
raised that’s it because it takes every
kind of people you know and so I think
that that parenting is probably one of
the most important positions on the
planet and we have to take it very
seriously and and it takes a village to
raise raise child
I’m where I am because of my village
well Darius McCreary man appreciates you
telling your story I think it’s a very
important story with ups and downs and
successes and also downfalls and it’s
really I think in this world where
everyone wants to be an actor everyone
wants to be on TV everyone wants to be
in movies it’s just very important to
kind of see the steps involved to
actually achieve that and then also to
maintain that because it’s very easy to
be a one-hit wonder in any profession
but to actually continue to do it year
after year decade after decade like
yourself that’s where you can see where
the real talent actually lies man man
thank you my brother I really appreciate
that that means a lot man it really does
thank you for the opportunity man it’s
always a pleasure to be able to sit down
you know with with tastemakers man and
people like yourself who really do
understand both sides of the gambit cuz
it is a gamut that we ready man you know
and sometimes I feel like Eddie Murphy
in the golden child I got the knife the
turtle the goddamn lights and other
times I feel like Where’s Waldo
but we’re gonna keep on pressing man I
feel like the hardest-working man in
show business today you know and uh and
by the grace of God man we will continue
to bring smiles to faces and change
hearts and lives no doubt until next
time my man peace right on things

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